Tag: Humor

Don’t worry: this punitive tax policy won’t increase utility costs for the millions of Americans who buy electricity from Exelon subsidiaries or competitors!

President Obama may be hedging on the EPA’s righteous destruction of American polluters, but that doesn’t mean dirty corporations are off the hook. Sure, we’ve already soaked Exxon and Chevron, but the ill-gotten gains of a few more polluting fat-cats will cover the nation’s budget deficit!

After a decidedly non-Progressive lapse in weekly recaps, we’re back on schedule. Now that we’ve soaked 36 of America’s largest employers, we’ve covered 6.587% of the 2011 deficit!

I know, even before soaking Citigroup we had put the hypothetical taxation screws to lots of banks – but it’s vital that banks to pay their fair share to the federal government!

Sure, we’ve already put the hypothetical taxation screws to numerous banks, but it’s really important for those Wall Street monsters to pay their fair share to the federal government!

I failed the last two weeks to keep the Soak the Rich hose trained on evil corporations! In honor of vacationer extraordinaire Michelle Obama, this special catchup edition will target fat-cat fatty-foods producers.

We’ve done it! After soaking only 30 of America’s largest employers, we’ve covered… barely 6% of this year’s deficit.

Who do you think Sen. Sherrod Brown (D-OH) is, some kind of unfair Republican?! While we’re penalizing banks, Bank of America is also going to have to pay for Washington’s totally necessary spending spree.

The problem with the federal balance sheet, you see, is that corporations don’t pay their fair share. US Bancorp is a prime example – and if those bankster crooks think they’ll get away with it, Sherrod would beg to differ!